Met The Most Inspirational Famous People. Pretty Much The Best Day of My Life. Milestone.

I guess I haven't really blogged in a while.

Been drinking too much tea, writing so many songs, and making a lot of lattes lately.

I'm a barista now ! So exciting.


Major update: I met Of Monsters and Men over the weekend ! :)
http://www.ofmonstersandmen.com

Words To You.

I don't want to waste my life regretting what I have not said.

I don't want to regret saying what I have not said.

So I sit back.

Pondering the objections and projections of an unlikely love.

A question.

An exclamation.

None of This Would Have Happened If I Had Just Gone In With Wet Shoes And Bought A Cup of Tea

Today I was sitting on a bench in the mall, minding my own business, people-watching, after work.

Noteworthy indeed was the pile of water I came to notice at my feet.

Apparently my water bottle had been dripping for the entire 10 minutes that I had been sitting there.

It probably looks like I "wet" the bench.... if you catch my drift.

So, not only was my mood dampened (pardon the pun) because I didn't want to go into DAVIDsTEA (my favourite place on earth) after work (because I had stepped in a puddle on the way, ruining my shoes) looking like crap and smelling like bleach (I'm a hostess at a restaurant), but the mood had actually been brought to life, when I opened up my bag and my apron and shoes were found to be soaked through.... in lemon water.

How fun.

I really needed a cup of tea at that moment, but I figured it wasn't worth the embarrassment, being so wet and all.

None of This Would Have Happened If I Had Just Gone In With Wet Shoes And Bought A Cup of Tea {Before Sitting Down on the Bench to Mope About My Wet Shoes}.

Is it too superficial of me to say that I dislike going into my favourite places after work because I want to be able to make an impression, and because I don't want to buy anything without looking good?

Don't answer.

I probably am acting a little too superficial right now.

Looks like I'll be brewing my own tea tonight. Good thing I have a hearty supply of DAVIDsTEA products.

Silence.

I thought I'd worked it out and gotten over you.

But see... I still can't seem to stop thinking about you.

And you probably don't even know I've liked you since forever a three years ago.

Now we barely talk.

And I should probably walk away.

But I don't know how.

I don't know how to shut someone out, who helped me open up my heart in the first place.

I'm looking for you.

Across the lake, to the mountains and in the lavender-lit grey-time sky.

Beneath the benches of solitude.

In the trees.
In the trees.
In the trees.

Come and find me.

beautiful person

"When I look into your eyes, it's like watching the night sky." - 'I Won't Give Up' by Jason Mraz.

Honestly, I haven't quite figured you out, but I'd like to try.

You are so full of wonder, it just makes me smile.

It's quite like magic, how you act upon deeds so genuine.

We are not the children we used to be.

"We were barely 18 when we'd crossed collective hearts.
It was cold, but it got warm when you'd barely crossed my eye.
and then you turned, put out your hand,
and you asked me to dance.
I knew nothing of romance, but it was love at second sight."

I Love Autumn

This season comes with so many feelings. It is both warm and cold. The leaves are bright and happy... though the sky is grey.

The other night a good friend invited me out to a worship night at a nearby college. It was wonderful. I looked out the window at one point and realized that though it was cold out at the time, just a few hours ago it had been a warm afternoon. Things are changing drastically. We haven't had weather this bizarre since 1945, says the local newspaper.

But as I looked into the night sky brazed by the fog... I thought about God.
God's picture must be like the sky. Sometimes I like to think of his eyes being the universe in it's entity.
The sky is always changing, and in yet some sense it is consistent. It is always there. It isn't always what we want it to be, but it's what we need it to be.

We haven't had rain in weeks.

We don't necessarily like the rain.

Nonetheless we need it immensely. The grass is brittle and the air is quite dry.

I was figuring during worship that God is quite a mystery in a sense, because we have not physically seen Him. I trust He is there. That is what faith is for. I know He is because of the feelings and happenings that have occurred over the past few months especially where I have felt His presence.

Faith is difficult to explain unless you have experienced it...so I shall not ramble too much on that note. Just this: the other day I was talking about someone dear to my heart... and I said something that my heart must have known for the past two years for sure, but has just now put words to. "Faith is an experience of enlightenment that no human can touch. It is in a place so deep within our souls that only the Enlightener can handle."

Back to what I was saying.

I love autumn. Specifically Autumn 2012. I have seen sunshine and felt cold and witnessed the changing of colours upon the beautiful trees. I do not despise the falling of leaves. It kind of reminds me of the natural state of things. Trees without leaves. Nothing to disguise their backbone or structure.

I love autumn because it's all the best wrapped into one phase. God's beauty is everywhere. Is unique persona. His mystery. It's in the clouded skies and the blank blue paint of a brisk morning.

It is an experience I wish to savour.

It is just beauty.

I'll Give You Some, If You Give Me Some First.

re·spect/riˈspekt/

Verb:

Admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.

Sometimes I get super tired of those kids I used to be close to, who don't respect my favourite choices of music. I've been a strong supporter of one of my most inspirational artists (Young Chozen) for a couple of years now, but some people think he's just too "preachy," as I've heard it called before. 

My non-Christian friends don't understand why I'd support someone who remixes songs by their most inspirational artists. The way I see it, Young Chozen makes secular music healthy to listen to. No swearing, No inappropriate phrases. Nothing dirty. He tries to glorify God by making these mix-tapes. 

I'll take a swing at it and say that most of my friends don't like him because he isn't their kind of "party" music.

But here's the deal.

I don't disrespect your favourite artists, kid. I think that what they have to say isn't healthy to living the greatest life all the time. What I respect is the fact that you look up to something. You have someone of great influence in your life, who happens to work in the music world... I just disagree with some of the messages they stand for. Another thing I do respect about these secular artists you are a fan of: most of the time, they're absolutely genuine. 

Sometimes Christianity is inaccurately portrayed by hypocritical people of the Church. And that is extremely unfortunate for the people who are actually trying to do good by what they do. 

The thing is, Young Chozen is one of those Christians who isn't a hypocrite. He's made a life out of following God. He's not the Churchy person who acts like he's perfect 100% of the time, and back stabs non-Christians. Young Chozen admits his downfall all the time, and this is personified throughout the great majority of his songs.

Isn't that what you want to see? You're tired of Christians pointing the finger, and doing wrong against their own words...? Like the "Christian" who'll party it up during the week by losing all of their core values, then put on the "fake face" and go all religious on you. 

I'm trying to live my life by being a Jesus-follower every day. I try my best. I really do.

But I'm only human.

I think thoughts like any other human does.

I want to do things that most teens my age do... but instead I remember the biggest promise I've made to God: to represent Him accurately.

I hold myself to many values that a lot of people don't understand. That's part of the sacrifice of being a "Jesus Freak." We put up with a lot of crap thrown at us. We are ridiculed and picked on for listening to the apparently "stupid" tunes. We listen to Christian music by Young Chozen, Lecrae, Tedashi.... (I could go on!) because it enhances our relationships with God, and aids us in bettering our own lives. True Christian music that's real and alive... it helps us be real. No acting. It teaches us how to teach others. It teaches us that being a hypocrite is terrible. 

Christian music IS preachy. Sure it is. But that's not always a bad thing.

Its message is to help us become better people.

I guess what you don't realize is that our Christian music is always positive. Nothing is ever negative. 99% of the Christian music we have is supposed to encourage people.

I've noticed that 99% of secular music can encourage all sorts of unhealthy emotions, though. It warps depression, anger, sadness, love, and false hope all together.... Do you not find that confusing? 

What I like about Christian music is that it's real. It gives me true hope. It's always about true love. 

Maybe what you don't like to hear is the fact that it will always glorify God. Real Christians and Real Christian Music suggest that no one else is number one, but God; that the world doesn't revolve around you. 

Well. Maybe this will change your mind...? 

Though the world revolves around God... His love revolves around you. 

That's what keeps me going. When I am ridiculed for who I stand for, I remember that at least His love is saving me each and every day. 

Because Jesus loves me... I can be unafraid to live. 

I am 'Unafraid' to die. 

I am 'Unafraid' of fear itself.